FLOODESIGN

maybe this is too nosy, but what do you think those obstacles are from your vantage point? Especially when we're talking about love. CM: They're 978 obstacles, I think. And some of those will be in the design. Some of them are in the words that the actors speak. There are not just monologues — there are some solo pieces of text, there's some dialogue. You see people making obstacles through each other. SM: Obstacles through each other. Right. For example, I tend to vastly underestimate what I deserve. And so I approach things with lowered expectations to avoid disappointment. CM: Oh yeah, there's some of that in there. [laughs] SM: I had no idea how I would render that physically, but — CM: Me neither. SM: — that's not my job! [laughs] CM: Not my job either. AB: I have to find out where this paper comes from. You can talk, I think I'm going to be leaving a message SM: I see. Everything's a working meeting with you three — AB: [leaving a phone message] Hey Hamilton, it's Bogart here. I'm sitting here with Elizabeth Streb, and I think we want to look at using the rolled-up paper that you used in "Blank Page" for this piece we're working on, and we wonder how you made it? Anyway, that's what I'm calling about. Let me know. Love you wherever you are. I hear you're coming to Columbia, and I'm not going to be there. Bye. CM: Whoa, that was a good message. SM: That's a good way to get the disappointing news out of the way. AB: Just at the end of a conversation. SM: Of a non-associated conversation. AB: Anyway. Sorry. You were trying to do your job. SM: So were you! AB: Yeah, it's kind of like that, right? SM: I was asking Chuck about this idea of the obstacles that we put in front of ourselves and the ways we self-sabotage when it comes to love. It just feels so uncomfortable to talk about. AB: It made you uncomfortable, man. SM: It did! Because I hate talking about myself. That's why I write about everybody else. But I'm curious — you know, when you think about that in your own mind, what are the obstacles that you feel like you put in front of yourself when it comes to giving or receiving love? I think that's the question for the whole group. AB: Wow. Well, I mean this project is a great example. I love Elizabeth. We've never worked together. I know I love Chuck; I've worked with him a lot. But the obstacle is that we have this huge obstacle, which is these ideas that are so disparate. It's a hybrid! And there's no dangling signifiers! SM: Or there might be. ES: Oh, I hope not. I mean, who knows, right? AB: I think you've used the word trust before. So the biggest obstacle is one's fear and the solution to that is trust. There's something that somebody said once, which is, if you work from fear, your search is for safety. If you work from trust, your search is for freedom. It's a completely different process. ANNE BOGART: Wow. Well, I mean this project is a great example. I love Elizabeth. We've never worked together. I know I love Chuck; I've worked with him a lot. But the obstacle is that we have this huge obstacle, which is these ideas that are so disparate. It's a hybrid! And there's no dangling signifiers! SORAYA NADIA MCDONALD: Or there might be. ANNE BOGART: If you work from the state of fear, your search, what you're looking for, is safety. If you work from trust, your search is for freedom. It's profound, isn't it? SORAYA NADIA MCDONALD: Very. That's the struggle, isn't it — we are stuck between these two priorities. Just at large. Which I understand a little bit more now, because freedom is — when you think of it that way — it's scary. Trusting people is scary. ELIZABETH STREB: Oh, I hope not. I mean, who knows, right? 27 | PEAKPERFS.ORG

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